Great number, eh?

Tonight I am working the late shift...because I can.

10. I escorted one of the non-badged volunteers through security checkpoint. Yeah, he has a nail or pipe or some other unknown piece of metal in his knee AND the TSA team had rotated so no-one knew him. 25 minutes later....he'd been scanned, patted and molested but he was cleared. 25 MINUTES!!!!

9. I have said repeatedly that I should not be in charge of answering the phone. Sometimes TL get lulled into a false sense of security and forgets...silly woman. A soldier that didn't know if he was returning from R&R but thought he was called, call the PAP. He calls back, PAP doesn't want him because he's actually returning from AIT (huh?) and he needs to call an 800 number to get his itinerary. Can I mention that in the first call I asked are you returning to Kuwait, Afghanistan or Iraq? Answer: Yes. That prolly should have been my first clue. So...then I hang up and task team lead to go pick him up. Name? (shrug) Does he have bags? (shrug) Is he wearing a bunny suit? (Shrug) Is the sky blue? (Shrug) followed by WHY ARE YOU LETTING ME ANSWER THE PHONE??

8. God I love this job!

7. We love you too Chellie! (that's from TL#2. I <3 her!)

6. TL #2 spies a deserted bridal bouquet laying on top of a recycle can outside our door. "Chellie, go get it." Okay!!

TL: Wait, what if it has a bomb in it?
Me: OMG!!! Why would you tell me that right before I go get it!!!

I retrieved it but performed a very strict and complete test (ear to stem, listening for ticking) before I apprehended the suspect and placed in a vase of water. I freaking felt like James Bond...

The Target:



"I bet it was pretty before it got ugly," says TL

5. I don't know how to explain this but #6 led to talk of what would you do if...I already have my plan because that's the type of person I am...I'm going down the tunnel at B15 and running for dear life. I remember nothing else from my TSA training EXCEPT that I have access to be down there on the thing where the planes land. In my head I see me running, OJ Style with helicopters and DFW police following slowly behind me. I know I'm weird.

4. TL: Name a famous basketball player! Chellie: Dr. J (followed by stunned silence)



So? Maybe I'm not the most knowledgeable sports database in the world...I know more than TL!!!! (see #2)

3. I will say that the one regret I have about working the late shift is that I missed what might have been a very impressive outfit that the fireman Chaplin d had on...oh, man I would've paid money to see that thing.

2. More 'basketball' saga:

TL: Wait, maybe it was Michael Irvin.
Me: WHAT? He didn't play basketball!!
TL: Well, it was SOME sports figure.
Me: (laughing hysterically)
TL: It was eighty something...
Me: OMG!! Are you serious right now? Michael Irvin was the greatest point guard the Dallas Cowboys ever had!!

1. Drum Roll Please....here is an exact replica of the outfit D had on...I can't express how sad I am to have missed this. I hope his fireman friends laugh.. CAUSE WE ARE!!!




There I go...saving the world, one crazy a$$ shift at a time....

*** PRAY FOR MY MARINES AND ALL THAT ARE STILL DEPLOYED FIGHTING IN AFGHANISTAN ***