Oh, hell yes. I was sick and miserable but there was no way I was going to miss my first weekend back with a badge. I mostly stood off to the side with a Kleenex and a wad of crackers. Rex in effex.

It was like the mothership had called me home. All the bitterness receded as I made my way through the checkpoint without a single mishap (probably because i didn't have a belt on)...and I didn't even care if I got sent to Term D. I was just happy to be back.

Thank the good Lord above.

I can't wait to bake cookies, because that's what I heard us old ladies do over at the USO.

Are you ready for the Top Ten? I am...although it probably sucks because I was high on sinus meds.

10. Soldier: Why do you volunteer?
Chellie: Because my husband is in the service.
Soldier: Really?
Chellie: No. (laughs at his shocked expression)

What? It sounds way better than 'I like uniforms'.

9. The Cowboys STUNK up the place Sunday afternoon. VR cracked me up when she let go a string of curses that made the sailor at the bar laugh. Kidding, he wasn't really a sailor.

8. VR asking what do we watch once football season is over. Golf, news, MMA. Laughing at her appalled expression.

7. Poor dude decided to take a chance on the Roast Beef. He was a trooper and ate the whole thing then followed it up with two bowls of Fruit Loops. My Hero!

6. At the USO if you are facing the bar there is an area to the right that has hygiene and medicine like items. It is a barren wasteland for us lowly volunteers because it is the least frequented spot of the bar area. Anytime someone asks for something from there, there is always this blank look that falls over the V's face. And it's contagious. We all look at each other like, "Nail File? WTH is a nail file?" It's actually quite funny and should be attempted as a maneuver to stump us. Works every time.

5. I'd forgotten how much I missed the money-in-the-small-donation-box-hole. I'm smiling watching someone struggle when he looks up and says, "You're enjoying this?" My reply? 'Oh, you have no idea.'

4. VR has a fondness for all things Nebraska...something about going to school there. A guy walks in wearing a Nebraska shirt and she squeals like a banshee. It was hilarious...

3. ...Right up until we both realized the guy wearing the shirt was about to cry. Apparently it was his first time leaving home after the holidays to go back to wherever he came from. It was heartbreaking. Especially when he said, "As you might have guessed, I don't have much of an appetite. None at all."

afterthought: shut up that I don't know more about his coming from/going to...I don't like to pry and that's all bits and bytes anyway. The point is he was CRYING and that does something terrible to a girl...who could be expected to concentrate?

2. Who refilled the salt drawer and had about a pound of leaked salt land on her flip-flop clad shoe? Yeah. That would be me. Do you know how hard it is to play that shit off?

1. "I'm a Georgia Peach." That my friends is going to break a thousand hearts in about 20 years.

There was a couple of other really, really funny things that happened but I don't like to make fun of people....too much.

I'm off to start baking...

Saving the world, one broken salt packet at a time. (damn it felt good to add that tag line)